Decoding Discipleship Myths: Grow on My Own

A little note about the series: This article is part of a multi-part series regarding myths relating to discipleship and spiritual growth. While each article will be able to stand alone it will be important to read all in the series. Far too many myths exist within the church about what it means to grow spiritually and how a church facilitates that growth. The goal of these articles is to identify those myths and give thought to how to possibly overcome those myths within your organization.

Grow on My Own

Understanding the Myth

The idea here is that a believer can grow spiritually in isolation. All that is needed is to read the Bible, pray, eat, love, and whatever else you want to add into the equation. The community aspect of other believers, typically within a local church, is not necessary for growth to take place. Often there has been some sort of hurt taking place, or a failure of leadership in some way, that has created an understandable jaded attitude towards local communities of believers, i.e., the church down the street. Or any church for that matter. Wounds from church, and its “well-intentioned” people, run deep and take a long time to heal. That isn’t the only vein of this myth though. Plenty believe that they can study the Bible on their own, make their own determinations about it, and be perfectly fine. They aren’t though. The idea itself is rooted in a passionate individualism rising from the Greco-Roman Western civilization. It is ripe for misunderstanding and heretical development. Coming alongside this myth are the attempts of the church to counteract it by emphasizing other myths already discussed. For instance, church admonishes people to show up and attend because there is no “Lone Ranger” Christian. They even throw in the few verses from Hebrews about not forsaking meeting together. In a sense that is accurate, but you don’t deal with one myth by emphasizing another.

Growing through Community

Other people are hard. Really, they’re pretty annoying. And those are not even the stupid ones. Still, others are needed in life. There is a lot to learn in the Bible. There is no shortage of study guides, materials, and opinions out there. But God’s principles were not meant to be lived in solitude but amongst a community. The truest things of God are only done in the context of relationships. To act justly, show compassion, and bring mercy all require other people. And for you to experience those things requires other people. Growth takes place in the practice and action of the principles of God. What God has called His people to is a life of giving and receiving grace within community. And, yes, that involves giving and receiving correction, but that must be done on covenant love. Your best friends stab you in the front and stand with you through the pain. Growing spiritually requires community. You can increase knowledge on your own, but growth comes through putting the tenets of Christ into practice in community. There will be hurts. There will be failures. There will also be incredible joy, peace, and comfort.

Spheres of Community

Every person has multiple spheres of community. Most of these spheres are choice-based. Some are not. Your family is not a choice-based sphere. You get what you get. Plenty of both positive and negative there. Each person has the community sphere of their workplace, neighborhood, church, and so many others. The church one might even go deeper if your church has multiple services, or campuses. You have friend groups. You have bible study groups. You have social style clubs, or organizations. There isn’t a lack of community in life. The question is how you engage in that community. Your deepest life issues don’t need to be broadcast across every community group. That is a great way to get uninvited. But do you approach your involvement, efforts, and time in the group from a self-centered perspective or one of grace? What do you offer before what you can receive? All of these communities in life provide places to put faith into action.

The Closest Community

There is a group that carries the most influence on you. The people closest to you are vital. One should be your spouse. Your spouse shouldn’t be the only one. There needs to be someone, or a couple few someones, who can tell you that you are being dumb and you will trust them to be truthful about it to you. And you can do this same with them. The vast majority of spheres of community in your life will not fit this description. The people closest to you will see all of the imperfections and love you anyway. You will be the same to them. You are and will continue to be a reflection of the people that are closest to you. Be careful with who gets to fill those spots. 
Spiritual growth won’t happen without community. Not full growth. You can learn plenty on your own and through your own personal study. But the faith of Christ is meant to be lived outwardly in the communities of your daily life. It is not perfect. There will be lots of struggle. But let the joy of Christ have its full place in your heart so that you will shine that out to others.

Brian Hatcher

Brian grew up outside of Fort Worth, TX. At the age of 15 his life was dramatically changed by Jesus after being invited to church by the person he called after attempting to take his own life. A year after beginning to follow Jesus he was called into ministry. He went to Oklahoma Baptist University (OBU) where he completed a Bachelor of Arts in Ministry with a special emphasis on Biblical Languages along with a minor in Business Administration. He went on to complete a Master of Arts in Theology at Southwestern Theological Seminary with a thesis on Karl Barth’s Trinitarian theology. Brian has served on church staffs in the areas of discipleship, administration, men’s ministry, and education for over 20 years in Texas, Georgia, Missouri, and Tennessee. Brian met his wife Jaclyn at OBU and they have been married for more than 25 years. Together they are parents to three boys, two dogs, and a host of birds in the backyard that depend on them for food. Brian is passionate about helping people get to know the Jesus he has gotten to know over these years. He is an avid woodworker, is almost undefeated at Wii golf on the Nintendo Switch, and loves to see his family experience life.  

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